I am writing a daily blog to work through overcoming homelessness and detail the fresh start I am embarking upon with my family.
Last night I ‘lost’ my phone. I left it in the kitchen after cooking dinner with the intention of picking it up when I took the empty plates back to the kitchen later on. I didn’t need it, I figured, because I was with my family and I prefer not to look at it after dinner. When I returned to the kitchen, however, it was gone. And I panicked.
I looked high and low for it, but couldn’t find it anywhere. My son kept saying it was likely that our friend (who had gone to bed) had picked it up by accident and I shouldn’t worry about it until I saw him in the morning. All good advice but for some reason, I was panicked without it. It’s ridiculous how much it bothered me to not have my mobile near me. I do listen to rain noises or waves to help me sleep, but the lack of that shouldn’t create the panic it did.
I slept like a dream. I didn’t wake up at all, though I was tired, and when my alarm went off I was shocked. I had one of the most restful night’s sleep I’ve had in the longest time. And I felt so much better for it this morning. Yesterday, I felt as though I was coming down with a cold but today I feel as fit as a fiddle. On my morning walk today I didn’t struggle with breathing through my nose as I did yesterday and my chest didn’t feel tight. I had a lovely walk, hearing a bird sing that I’d never heard before which was beautiful and I met a lovely dog. Again, I felt energised even more so than yesterday because I’d had this night’s sleep.
Nothing in my life has changed yet I feel so much better in myself. I’m going to keep my phone out of my bedroom from now on I think, see if that makes a consistent difference to my sleep. I’ve always had my phone in my bedroom, charging, often because it has been my alarm (now it’s my Kindle) and also because I do like to have white noise while I sleep. But, I am going to experiment and see if there’s a difference.
I also woke up this morning with some ideas about how to make some changes in my books, combining with some of the ideas I had yesterday. It feels as though I have the voices of my main characters back which will help in the changes I am looking to make in them. And rather than feel any sense of failure, it felt really empowering.
Because I am soaring. I am thriving. I am successful. And I am utterly grateful.
Louisa Simpson 