I am writing a daily blog about my family and I being homeless in order to process my emotions about the situation and to learn the lessons from it. And if I help someone alone the way, I will be very happy.
I have been struck throughout this whole situation I have found myself in by the reaction of other people. People who promise to be there for you and wanting to help in any way they can who promptly disappear (when you haven’t actually asked for anything). People who are coming to you to place all of their problems on your shoulders so you can help them find a way forward…then have no interest in listening to you. And in one instance, tell you they have a means of helping, only to pull the rug from under your feet. There are the ones who pledge their friendship in one breath and judge you in another. Who treat you differently because of the choices you have made for your life.
These are people who, when things have happened in their life, you have been there for. The dinners you’ve cooked for them, the time you have spent listening to them, the ways in which you have provided both emotional and material support to them. Even encroaching on family time to do so because they are your friend. Those who have made certain decisions in their life and you’ve not said anything because it’s none of your business. The investment into a friendship you have made not to get anything back, just because you’re the kind of person who helps others when in need.
And then there are the people who, frankly, knock your socks off with their kindness and generosity. Those who you would not for a moment have expected it from. Like the friend I met through a Facebook group nearly two years ago now, who I have never met in person but have had countless facetime chats with and who has turned her life into a raging success, who has never once judged me only encouraged me and has been there emotionally and on one occasion, materially for me. The other friend I met through her YouTube channel (Soul Path Calling) who I speak with daily now, who has inspired me in all kinds of different ways and been one of the biggest cheerleaders for my writing. Again, we have never met. There are the women I worked with when I was able to do my cleaning job, from the owner of the company and her mother, my partner-in-crime in cleaning to my other colleagues. Never once did they treat me with anything other than kindness, caring, and general loveliness. Women who I vaguely knew in the village where I live but who I got to know really well while working with them. All of these women are brave, amazing, and smashing it in their lives and I am so grateful to know them.
Then there are those people who go absolutely above and beyond. Like the friend we are living with at the moment who has opened his home to us and never once asks for anything in return. Nothing is ever a problem, and we are free to avail ourselves of anything. His kindness and generosity is beyond anything I ever expected. He has a gruff exterior, but beneath it the man has a true heart of gold. I can never express how grateful I am to him, how grateful we all are to him. And there is another friend, someone who I haven’t spoken to in a long while who has been through her fair share of trials and tribulations, judgement and scorn as well as difficulties and tragedy. But she has stood with her head held high throughout, never giving any appearance what others say particularly bothering her though no doubt it did at times. And she soared. I always found her something of an enigma if I am honest. Like me, she doesn’t get close to many people but when she does, she is loving and loyal. I have had some of the funniest moments in her company as she has a way with words that is truly clever and hysterically funny.
She is a follower of my blogs I have discovered and has contacted me today to help me in a way that was wholly unexpected, truly wonderful and is something I am feeling excited about…when I haven’t felt excited in the longest time. I am also hugely, hugely grateful (though she has told me to stop saying thank you!). I cannot express, though, how much her gesture has meant to me. It has restored my faith in a lot of things at a point where I was becoming far too jaded and inured to disappointment.
I had a restless night again last night and at one point I honestly felt as though there was nowhere else to turn. I just wanted to sleep but everything was running around in my head, and in the end I just asked the universe to help me sleep because after the night before, I desperately needed it. And I slept, but just before doing so the thought popped into my head ‘f**k it, just think f**k it to everything worrying you’ and I was then asleep for a good five hours. So, this morning, I decided to ask for some help with a roof over my head (we cannot stay here forever). Then my friend rang. All of which proves to me that the universe does deliver – ask, release, and see what happens – and that there are some truly wonderful people in this world. And I am lucky enough to know some of them.
I am soaring. I am thriving. I am successful. I am grateful.
Louisa Simpson 