I have written before that I find relaxing difficult, and I am known to push myself to burnout which is something I absolutely do NOT recommend. At all. I am, though, trying to make more of a concerted effort to ‘unplug’, to recognise the signs that I need to and to ask myself what I need to help make it happen.
I don’t see writing as work. Whether it is writing on here or writing my books, I really do not see it as work. Consequently, I can push myself with it to the point where I am in dire need of some relaxation. And more than just closing the laptop when it’s time to make dinner then sit in front of the television for an hour or so before bed. That’s when I need to truly unplug. Another time is when my thoughts start racing. When I have a million and one ideas running through my head, all charging through at a sprint. Thoughts about what I need to do next, what I want to do next, what I am going to do next. Then there are the times when I am just starting to freak myself out about something, a problem that’s niggling away or something I have decided to create fear and anxiety over (that hasn’t happened).
I did just that this morning, actually. I sat down to write on here, and I decided to write about the qualities I value in a friend. It just wasn’t happening, my head wasn’t in the right place and I was starting to spiral. I could see it in my writing, and I decided to use it for a download rather than be something I would publish. It didn’t work very well either way, I was just tying myself up in knots and making myself feel worse. Basically, I have done too much writing over the weekend (if that is even a thing!), and what I was really nervous about was the fact that I was going to meet another author who lives locally to me. I recognised at least that I was ragging myself out, so I stopped. I walked away from the laptop, and I decided that the best thing I could do was to meditate. To calm my mind, re-focus my thoughts and bring myself back to centre.
I realised then that what was really triggering me was the transition from the old me to the new me. For the second Sunday in a row, I had spent time with people that I have little in common with now. I have ascended, if I’m honest, and I’ve become someone completely different. The things that used to interest me, now don’t. The small talk, the chatter about other people and inconsequential things no longer stimulate me. Don’t get me wrong, these are lovely people and I like them, but I have nothing in common with them now, really. For the second Sunday in a row, I wanted to shout out how I have changed, how my perspective has changed, how I have pulled away the veil and I see life so differently now. That I couldn’t bear the same conversations, in effect, we’ve been having in the decade I have known them. I’m not judging them at all, they seem very happy in their lives and I am happy for them, but the truth is I never really fit in with their lives. I just pretended, and it was exhausting. So, it was even more exhausting yesterday when I was putting a mask on over the vastly different perspective I now have.
For the second Monday in a row, I have had to work through all of this baggage and come to the conclusion that the ascension I have been going through, has finally happened and made the shift. I’ve had to go through my emotions, the bafflement as to why certain things don’t feel as though they ‘fit’ anymore, and come to my own conclusions. But in order to do that, I needed to unplug. And today, I chose a variety of methods. I met with the author, it was a great meeting and it was like I was starting to find my new tribe which I have been searching for. I went shopping for some food, and I visited with my parents. I switched off, essentially. I deliberately cleared my mind, and in so doing gained the insights I was looking for. When I came home, I sat down with my husband and we watched a show we are following, having a good chat about what on earth is going on in it (it’s a thriller), and who the characters really are. I love to dissect things in that way.
I also journaled earlier today when I realised I was spiralling. I do that when I need to just get something out, but I don’t know what the words are. When I am looking for that guidance from my Higher Self but my egoic mind is being too loud and difficult for me to hear. So, I journal. It helps to get the ‘chatter’ down on paper, to clear the decks so-to-speak and let my Higher Self speak, to let that guidance come out. That reassurance that things really are okay, that I am going through a process that has been entirely necessary to bring me to where I am now, with the knowing and understanding I have now. And to fulfil my purpose with that information. That I wouldn’t be able to do what I know I want to do if I hadn’t faced down the challenges I have been confronted with. Faced them down, and learned from them. To the point where I now know when I do need to unplug and have a list of things I can do to achieve just that.
It was in doing the things that I did, things that I don’t need to think about in any great detail, that I can do on autopilot such as the shopping, that I was unplugging. I didn’t let myself think about anything I didn’t really need to. I gave my mind a rest, all kick-started by a great meditation, journaling and the soothing sense of being in touch with my Higher Self whilst both. My Higher Self who is completely chill, knows exactly where we are going and knows she is taking the reins now.
Only when my mind wasn’t racing, when I was starting to itch to get back to writing did I start this blog. And it has flowed, which means the unplugging worked. And means that I needed to do it.
It is about being self-aware, knowing the signs that you’re in need of doing something that is mindless for a while that helps you to know when to unplug and what you can do to achieve that. Sometimes, I do the hoovering. Another time I will go and sit under my favourite tree and just close my eyes to listen to the birds singing. Other times, it will be listening to music or reading something simple. Nearly all of these, though, happen after a meditation and/or journaling. I need that to kick-start the unplugging process.
Today has been a perfect example of the unplugging for me. I’d be interested to hear your stories about this.
Louisa Simpson 